


Love's Such A Delicate Thing That We Do

by ObsidionWingsofMidnight



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Blade Runner Fusion, Human Rin, M/M, MakoHaru Centric, Minor Matsuoka Rin/Nanase Haruka, Minor Tachibana Makoto/Yamazaki Sousuke, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, also the slowest of updates, blade runner rin, blade runner sousuke, but it's not the main focus, cop haru, cop makoto, endgame makoharu, endgame sourin - Freeform, human haru, i'm busy ok, i'm serious about that part, it's science fiction yo that's what it's all about, not necessary to see the blade runner films or read the book beforehand but it might help, questions about what makes people human cuz this is blade runner we're talking about, replicant makoto, replicant sousuke, some violence probably because this is blade runner we're talking about, takes place some years after blade runner 2049, the main focus is dorks in love, the slowest of burns
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-22
Updated: 2019-05-05
Packaged: 2019-05-26 21:14:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15009584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ObsidionWingsofMidnight/pseuds/ObsidionWingsofMidnight
Summary: The rest of the world accepted people having replicants around for pleasure, but for love? Hell no, that was just wrong in their eyes. How could you love something that didn’t have the capacity to truly love you back?





	1. The Differences Between Us

**Author's Note:**

> _I am a flower quickly fading_   
>  _Here today and gone tomorrow_   
>  _A wave tossed in the ocean_   
>  _A vapor in the wind_
> 
>  
> 
> - _"Who Am I" by Casting Crowns_

Haru hated his job sometimes.

Actually, he hated his job a lot of the time, possibly most of the time. It depended who was asking.

Most of the time it wasn’t really that bad- it was just…. boring. In that monotonous way that many people find their jobs, no matter what the job is. Many people might have thought that being a detective was an exciting experience, but to Haru it wasn’t all that interesting. Sure, there were times when his job required some high paced action, but for the most part it was just paperwork. There seemed to be endless amounts of forms to fill and reports to write up over petty crimes- a wallet being stolen, a sign being vandalized, etc. He hated the paperwork.

But more than the paperwork, he hated moments like this.

Homicide.

Three Caucasian males, mid-twenties it looked like. Their bodies were strewn over the sidewalk like toys a child had grown tired of playing with. The one closest to him had his head crushed in.

He glanced briefly at it before moving on. There wasn’t much need to look closely at it for evidence. There was only one kind of person that could do that with their bare hands. The real question would be what kind of model had made such a grisly accomplishment.

“Makoto,” he called, not bothering to check if the other was following. He knew Makoto would come if he called. He always did.

“Yes, Haru-chan?” the taller man asked, appearing over his shoulder. He looked tired but smiled softly.

The shorter man huffed. “Drop the chan,” he grumbled halfheartedly. “Contact Rin and let him know he and Sousuke have another job,” he ordered. The vibrant green of Makoto’s eyes seemed to dim even more at his words. He continued to smile, although it looked a little more strained than before. At least, Haru thought so. But perhaps he was just projecting.

“Okay,” Makoto replied before shuffling off to do as told.

Haru sighed as his partner walked away. He looked to the murky skies and prayed for rain. It was always cloudy in L.A., but it didn’t rain nearly as much as Haru would have liked. Mostly it was just dark and smoggy and entirely uninviting. But that’s how most of the world was these days.

Sometimes he would pull out his old textbooks and run his hands across the pages. History told of times when the world was green and bright, where the skies were blue, and the sun bathed the Earth in light. The photographs were the only part of that world that was preserved.

His favorite photos were of the ocean. Of lakes, of rivers, of any natural body of water that the people in the past underappreciated. Nowadays all the water was polluted. It had to go through several filters before being fit for human use. The purest natural water on the planet was the rain. Even then, you weren’t supposed to stay exposed to it for too long. Humanity had poisoned the surface of the planet so badly that even the atmosphere was sick.

What he would give to travel to the past and swim in open water.

A hand on his shoulder broke him out of his thoughts. “Sousuke said he and Rin will be here in five minutes.”

Haru’s lips twitched downward imperceptibly. “That’s awfully fast. It took us over twenty to get here from the precinct.”

“They were getting lunch nearby apparently,” Makoto replied sheepishly. He removed his hand, and Haru mourned the loss of warmth. He had more pressing things to worry about though.

“Did you get the testimonies we needed?” he asked, walking closer to one of the corpses. The man’s head was twisted one hundred and eighty degrees from where it should have been, neck snapped in one clean motion. That made two kills carried out above the shoulders. He wondered if the third body would be different.

Makoto opened his mouth to reply but was cut off by one of their fellow cops. “We gathered all the testimonies from the people who stayed, and they’ve been fairly consistent. I’ve got the paperwork right here,” the man said. He looked older than Haru by a few years, maybe early thirties. There was a rumpled look about him that Haru seemed to find around more and more often these days. It was like every day everyone became more and more down trodden by the state of the planet. Then again, they probably were. There was a reason the richest people had all moved off world.

He considered thanking the man for his contribution because he knew it’s what Makoto would want him to do-and because Makoto was also doing it himself- but the next words out of the other man’s mouth stopped him.

“I don’t need your thanks, _skinjob._ Why don’t you do everyone a favor and stop pretending like you belong here. Go run off and hide with freaks that did this- we all know it’s what your kind really wants to do,” he spat, face twisting into an ugly sneer.

Haru’s blood boiled at the harsh words and the stricken look in Makoto’s eyes. How dare he? He marched toward the man, fully intent on knocking out his teeth for talking to Makoto like that, but strong hands held him back.

“It’s okay, Haru-chan.” Makoto smiled down placatingly at him, and although Haru still wanted to tear that man a new one, he decided to let it go for his friend’s sake.

He always did.

There had once been a time in his life that he hadn’t let things go that easily- back when they were younger and Haru knew a little less about pulling his punches. But he quickly learned that whenever he stood up to fight for Makoto, he was never the one blamed. He was always innocent to people’s eyes because he was human, and Makoto was not.

Makoto was a replicant. He was a standard ORCA model, and his “parents” had bought him when they were expecting twins. The Tachibana’s were not poor at the time, but they certainly wouldn’t have been called upper class or even upper middle class. The couple had to work long hours to stay afloat and comfortable, so they knew that Mrs. Tachibana taking prolonged time off to deliver and then care for their children would be a problem. Plus, Mrs. Tachibana had a better job opportunity approaching, and the couple was preparing to transfer to a new location. Having one kid was one thing, but having two? Double the amount of work that they had anticipated.

Mr. Tachibana’s parents lived out of state and couldn’t help, but they did suggest that the couple look into nanny droids. Now, nanny droids were highly reliable and smiled upon, but they did tend to be costly. The Tachibana’s couldn’t afford the expenses of two infants _and_ a replicant like that, so they had to think a little more creatively.

ORCA’s- or Optimum Reproduced Controlled Algorithm’s as designers called them- were one of the cheapest, yet most popular replicants on the market. They were easy to customize through standard pre-set options both physically and mentally, making them feel unique to their buyers for whatever purposes they desired. The Wallace Corporation had marketed them as a replicant that anyone could own that could be used for anything.

What everyone knew but was unwilling to admit though was that they were mainly bought as sexual companions. People were able to buy a partner for themselves that looked however they wanted, acted however they wanted, and most of all couldn’t refuse them.

Naturally, this made the Tachibana’s hesitant about buying one, for fear of what other’s might think of them, but in the end, they decided it was the best option. A little bit of judgement was better than being short on money in the long run.

They didn’t want to feel as though they were just buying a slave for their family though. Unlike many people, the Tachibana’s felt that replicants were unjustly treated and that although there were many things that separated them from humanity- they shared the most important part.

Heart.

Replicants were able to feel just as strongly as humans did; they simply weren’t allowed to act upon such feelings the way that humans could.

They knew that when they bought their replicant they were going to treat him right. They’d do their best to make him feel welcome and part of the family. When they went in to get their model customized they made sure of a few things. One, that their new member was able to age. They didn’t want to set them apart by making them watch everyone grow older around them while they remained unchanged. Two, that they were young enough to blend in as their future children’s older sibling. They settled on a boy because they figured if the twins needed protection a male replicant would be more intimidating than a female one. And lastly, they made sure they had memories with the Tachibana’s implanted into the replicant’s consciousness. Historically, replicants felt less alienated if they had memories before they were activated because it made them feel more human. More importantly, for the Tachibana’s it meant that their new replicant son would really feel like he was a part of their family.

Sure, Makoto obviously didn’t have a normal human childhood, given that he sprang into existence at eight years old physically, but it was a lot more than most replicants got. He stayed home and took care of the twins until they were old enough to attend kindergarten, and then the Tachibana’s sent him out to high school so that he could interact with society on his own more. Few people suspected his replicant status back then because the Tachibana’s simply told everyone that he’d been homeschooled.

The only ones who knew better were their neighbors the Nanase’s. To be honest, the only reason they’d divulged the information to them was that they learned immediately after moving in that the Nanase’s were passionate advocates for replicant rights.

Although the family looked detached and aloof, they were actually quite passionate people. Their house was proudly adorned with replicant rights flags, and that alone made the Tachibana’s feel safer. It was a load off their chests to have someone know their secret. They didn’t want people to know that their oldest son wasn’t biologically their son at all, and they would have gladly taken the secret to their graves if it kept Makoto safe. It was nice, however, to have someone else know that their son was not technically human but who would still treat him as if he was.

Haru had been eight when the Tachibana’s moved in next door- the same age Makoto was supposed to be. His parents had raised him to treat replicants as he would anyone else, so he didn’t mind that Makoto wasn’t human. In fact, it was kind of nice for him.

Haru was so unsociable as a child that his parents were concerned he’d never make any friends. His problem was that other kids all seemed too noisy and immature for him. Bold words for an eight-year-old, but it was true. His parents had never been ones for sugarcoating the state of the world, and they wanted him to understand how to make it better. Other kids his age didn’t have the same concerns.

Makoto on the other hand…. Well, he was pre-programmed with a middle school level education and the temperance of someone meant to care for small children, so he was different.

They easily became best friends, and neither of them saw anything strange about their relationship until they reached high school. Prior to that, Makoto wasn’t used to spending prolonged amounts of time away from his family. If Haru hadn’t been there he probably would have felt overwhelmed. He liked it though. He liked making new friends, although he was never as close to any of them as he was to Haru.

Everyone else thought it was weird how close they were. They did everything together. Which made no sense to their classmates because Makoto was such a nice open person, and Haru was as unyielding as a brick wall. There were rumors around school that he was actually a replicant, and that was why his parents were such strong activists. Oh, the irony.

It wasn’t until after they’d graduated high school that Makoto’s replicant status became an issue. As a replicant there weren’t many job options for him. And after the Blackout of 2022, the prohibition of replicants, and the subsequent repeal of the prohibition, all replicants had to be registered upon activation. So he couldn’t just pretend to be human and get whatever job he wanted.

Working for the police force was one of the only jobs available that didn’t require selling his body. The one stipulation was that after a series of replicants rebelling against their programming in the 2050’s all replicant cops had to be partnered with a human to watch them and take them out if necessary.

Fortunately for him, Haru was also interested in the police force.

During middle school his home had been broken into by anti-replicant activists. Haru had been at school and his parents at work, but his grandmother was still there at the time. She had been killed, ruthlessly, senselessly. The cops had been little help, since there were no living witnesses, and frankly because the police force was corrupt enough in their home town that there were probably plenty of people cheering for the Nanase’s lives being overturned.

The Nanase’s had been devastated of course, and considered moving somewhere new, but they didn’t want to leave the Tachibana’s alone. After what had happened, they wanted to make sure that Makoto was safe. No one knew he wasn’t human yet, but the possibility was always there.

Still, it was difficult to live in the house where their beloved Grandma Nanase had been murdered, so Haru’s parents essentially moved out to work elsewhere. Haru refused to leave, so the Nanase’s entrusted his care to the Tachibana’s who were more than willing to check in on him.

Haru may not have seemed as passionate as his parents at first look, or even second look, but there was still a fire in him that couldn’t be quenched. If there was anything that Haru was, it was stubborn.

So he threw himself into becoming a detective with reckless abandon. Makoto was right beside him, tempering his flames to make sure that he didn’t get into too much trouble. It was during this time that the two learned firsthand how differently the world treated replicants.

They’d always known of course, but in a sort of detached way. Back home no one had suspected Makoto, but here everyone knew exactly what he was, and they treated him differently for it. It was disheartening for Makoto, who was used to pleasing people and being well liked to being outright despised.

Haru punched a lot of people those first few months of training. But after a while he realized that he wasn’t just jeopardizing his own chances of becoming a cop, he was hurting Makoto’s chances as well. For one, everyone blamed Makoto for Haru beating people up in his name. More importantly, Makoto couldn’t join the police force unless he had a human partner. People who were willing to pair themselves up with a replicant were few and far between, so Haru knew he was Makoto’s only hope at joining. And Makoto had to join. There was no way in hell Haru was going to let him join some whorehouse.

So he pushed back the fire in his veins and let the snide comments that went in Makoto’s direction go.

But if ever a day came that replicants got the rights they deserved, Haru was going to find every last bastard that had ever said a bad word against his friend, and he was going to make them pay.

Makoto was more precious to him than anything else in the entire world. He was even more precious than the rain that he coveted.

He was in love with Makoto.

It was something he didn’t admit to anyone. Not his parents, not the Tachibana’s, and definitely not Makoto. Perhaps they suspected it, but no one said anything to him about it. The only person who did know was Rin. And that’s because Rin was a nosy bastard.

Oh, and did he mention? He was dating Rin. Yeah, he was well aware that it was unusual for someone to be dating someone while acknowledging their love for another, and to have their significant other know about their straying affections and be completely okay with it.

He and Rin were a special case.

In fairness, Rin knew from the beginning that Haru didn’t love him romantically, and they both knew that Rin wasn’t romantically interested in him either. Mostly it was convenient for them. Because Rin also had the hots for someone that he couldn’t have.

Rin was a blade runner- a cop whose job was specifically to hunt down rogue replicants and terminate them. Like Haru, he had a replicant partner.

Sousuke was one of the last Nexus-9’s to ever go into production. After the uprisings in the 2050’s, the Nexus-9 had lost popularity as they were no longer seen to be as reliable as previously thought. Oh, they were 99% there, but that 1% left was too dangerous to ignore. The Wallace Corporation had held on for a few years, but eventually they decided to move on from the Nexus-9’s. ORCA’s were already being produced, so they focused all their attentions into marketing them instead. ORCA’s were made to be weaker than their Nexus predecessors, and submissive in nature unless specifically requested otherwise. ORCA’s were essentially the next step up from Joi units, so they were more readily received by the public.

Sousuke was created with the purpose of being a blade runner, so he had nothing else to do but wait for a partner to show up. He was practically put in storage for years before Rin came along.

Rin heard that there was a replicant blade runner waiting for a partner at one of the precincts, and he jumped at the chance. He figured he’d get an adventure out of it.

Figures that he’d fall for the grumpy jerk.

So Haru and Rin were both head over heels for their replicant partners. No big deal. The only problem was that the obviously couldn’t be with said partners romantically.

The rest of the world accepted people having replicants around for pleasure, but for love? Hell no, that was just wrong in their eyes. How could you love something that didn’t have the capacity to truly love you back?

Haru thought that was a bunch of bullshit- Makoto was one of the most loving people on the planet.

But then again, it was sort of the reason why Haru didn’t confess his feelings. Not because he didn’t think Makoto was capable of love. Rather because he wasn’t sure Makoto would reciprocate because of the way he naturally felt or because he was programmed to. Makoto was at heart, programmed to please others. Haru wanted Makoto to love him, but not because his programming told him that he should.

It made him feel so shallow and dirty when he thought of it, but sometimes he wondered if others were right. Were replicants able to love without being programmed to do so?

That was definitely why Rin didn’t say anything to Sousuke. He was a good guy at heart, but he had a lot of prejudices ingrained him. He flat out told Haru that they might as well get with each other since the men they were in love with could never truly love them back.

It was stupid, but it had worked.

So Rin and Haru were dating. They even lived together.

But it wasn’t love.

Haru wasn’t sure it would ever be love- especially when their true affections were so near.

He glanced at the weary smile on Makoto’s face, took a deep breath, and twisted out of his grip. He wouldn’t punch the other cop’s lights out, but he wouldn’t forgive the man for what he said either.

“Send me the testimonies and any other files you’ve collected that might be useful for the case,” he ordered icily, glaring daggers at the older man. The other officer looked affronted by his cold behavior but complied nonetheless. Haru may not have been particularly large or bulky, but he was intimidating regardless. The man scurried off as soon as possible, casting a single backward glance at the pair as if to make sure they weren’t following him.

“Haru-chan, you should really be nicer. He was helping….”

“Drop the chan. And he’s not that helpful if he can’t keep his fucking mouth shut and be professional,” he huffed.

Makoto frowned at him and muttered something that sounded suspiciously like, “Language,” under his breath, but Haru ignored it. He approached the last body and bent down to get a closer look.

There was bleeding around the mouth and nose, and there was something odd about his neck. Like it had a dent in it. That made three killing shots above the shoulders without breaking any skin. Unusual. He’d definitely talk to Rin about it.

He turned to say something to Makoto but froze when a familiar yell rang out across the street. He didn’t have to turn around to figure out that Rin had arrived and was probably pushing past the yellow police tape and ignoring every strange look he got.

He sighed, standing up and brushing off his pants. “Noisy idiot,” he mumbled.

Makoto chuckled quietly beside him. “Haru-chan, that’s not very nice. You shouldn’t be so mean to your boyfriend,” he scolded gently.

He’d be a lot nicer to his boyfriend if his boyfriend was a certain tall brunette with green eyes that smiled brighter than the sun he saw in old photographs. Not that he’d tell Makoto that. He bit back a rather uncharitable remark towards Rin character and merely rolled his eyes instead. “Whatever. Come on, let’s go before he makes an even bigger ruckus.”

Time to deal with his boyfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> listen, blade runner 2049 was criminally underrated and i fucking love it and was filled with a burning desire to make a blade runner au sort of fic, so here we are
> 
> also i can not for the life of me think of a good name right now lol. I mean how do you beat a title better than "do androids dream of electric sheep"???? the answer is you don't. so the title on this comes from the "simple song" by the shins


	2. Rest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *rolls up 11 months later with starbucks*  
> oops

“For the last goddamn time, we are not having mackerel for dinner!”

“Who said ‘we’? Just get something else,” Haru retorted to Rin’s shouting. The twitch in the other man’s eye almost made him smile, but he knew if he showed any amusement he’d get scolded for it. 

A large hand fell on his shoulder, and he turned to look up at his best friend. “Haru-chan, maybe Rin is right. It’s not healthy to eat only mackerel.”

Haru absolutely did not pout at that, because he was a grown man, and grown men did not pout. He shrugged out of Makoto’s grip and grumbled, “I don’t  _ only  _ eat mackerel.” He totally ate other things. Like vegetables. And rice. Along with his mackerel. 

The brunette gave him a look that meant he knew exactly what Haru was thinking, making him huff. Okay, so maybe he ate more mackerel than was strictly recommended, but so what? He  _ liked _  mackerel. 

“Whatever. We are not going to eat at some run-down joint that sells mackerel, okay?” Rin interrupted their little silent conversation. “Look- there’s a decent Japanese place across the plaza, so let’s just go there. They even have outdoor seating so you don’t have to be stuck inside some crowded room. Even if the air quality inside is better than the smog out here,” he grumbled at the end. Haru huffed again, but begrudgingly agreed to go along with Rin’s plan after Makoto gave him a pleading look. 

He didn’t know why they were even bothering eating together- Rin and Sousuke ought to be heading out on their new assignment, now that they’d confirmed the killings Haru had been called in for were caused by replicants. Instead they were butting into Haru’s life. Annoying. 

All four of them had spent the last four or so hours discussing leads and compiling as much evidence from the scene as they could, and now that they were done it was dinner time. 

He would have preferred simply returning to his apartment and making something himself, but his  _ boyfriend  _ insisted that they all share a meal outside the apartment. Sometimes he wondered if it was really worth it to keep the facade of their relationship up. 

Of course, if he didn’t have Rin around to “date”, then who would he bemoan his unrequited love to? Makoto? The source of his unrequited love? Absolutely not. 

Besides, without his current boyfriend, Makoto would be pestering him well-meaningly about how he ought to find someone to settle down with. He’d done it plenty of times before Rin came crashing into their lives, and Haru was sure he’d start it up again if the two of them ever broke up. 

In reality it was simply more convenient to have his mutually loveless relationship with Rin than to end it. 

After all, it wasn’t like Haru was about to magically fall in love with someone else anyways.

He glanced surreptitiously at the tall brunette beside him, just in time to see him skirt awkwardly around a hologram of a dancing girl advertising some kind of energy drink. 

Rin snorted at the motion, having caught the moment just as Haru did. “Geez, Makoto- you don’t have to walk around a  _ hologram _ ,” he said pityingly. He rolled his eyes at the glare Haru sent him. 

Makoto sputtered at his words, hunching in on himself. “It feels rude to just walk through them like they’re nothing,” he said quietly. Rin merely rolled his eyes again, but Haru felt something clench painfully in his chest. Naturally, a human would think nothing about something so trivial, but for someone as compassionate as Makoto… for someone who many would also deem as nothing more than a complex sort of program…

He almost reached out to hold the other’s hand and tell him his feelings were justified, but before he could blink, someone else had beaten him to the punch. 

Sousuke  patted Makoto’s shoulder consolingly. “Don’t worry about it, Makoto. Rin would walk through physical people too if he could,” he said, smirking at the affronted look on the redhead’s face. 

“Excuse you! I wouldn’t do that to an actual person,” he whined. “It’s not like holograms are  _ alive _ .”

Sousuke waved off his protests. “Perhaps not. Not the way you or I are at least, but maybe they live in a different way.”

Rin pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled loudly. “What in the goddamn hell are you on about now, Sou? I swear, you and your weird philosophical bullshit-”

“I am merely trying to point out that your definition of life and what it means to be living may not be as clear cut as you think they may be. After all, an organic tree would be defined as “living” despite the fact that it does not breathe nor speak nor have a brain that we can associate with that of humans or animals. Why then, would a hologram be so different?”

“ _ Because _ ,” Rin said, putting emphasis on the single syllable, “Trees are  _ natural _ . Plants, humans, animals- organic things exist without the interference of humans.” He crossed his arms and looked sullenly up at his partner. It looked like dinner would have to be postponed until the argument was settled. Haru sighed quietly and pretended like he didn’t see the concerned look Makoto gave him. 

Sousuke, to his credit, didn’t bat an eye at the venom in Rin’s tone. Not that he normally would have anyways. Even if his expression wasn’t perpetually blank or mildly displeased at best, he was basically immune to Rin’s petulant attitude at this point. 

“You say that, but aren’t humans instrumental in everything that has shaped our planet to be the way it is today? There are hundreds of species that are extinct because of humanity, and those that have survived owe it entirely to human organizations that have fought to protect them. The same could be said of the plants that remain, and even the rest of your fellow humans.”

Rin groaned, throwing his arms skyward.  _ So dramatic _ , Haru thought. 

“Fine! But they weren’t created by humans! Things that were made by humans like computers and holograms and- and whatever- are not alive!” he nearly spat out. His little outburst was starting to draw a few odd looks, but anyone who noticed quickly went back to whatever else they were doing. A little spat in the street was hardly something worth noting in L.A.

Sousuke stared at his partner just long enough for it to start becoming uncomfortable before tilting his head and saying far too evenly, “I was created by humans. Am I not alive as well?”

The stricken look that crossed Rin’s face for a split second before disappearing behind a mask of outrage was answer enough.

“Fine. Have it your way then. It doesn’t matter anyways,” he said, dropping his eyes to glare at the pavement. “Let’s just go.” 

He shoved his hands deep in his pockets and spun around to stomp away towards the restaurant he’d pointed out earlier. Sousuke followed him without a word, seemingly unaffected by their conversation. Haru started to follow as well, but after a few steps he realized that Makoto wasn’t by his side. 

He stopped in his tracks and turned to find his friend rooted to the spot, staring dolefully at the dancing hologram. He didn’t seem to notice that the rest of the group had left. 

Something twisted inside Haru, making it harder to breathe. Maybe it was just the air pollution clogging up his lungs. Or maybe it was because of that look in Makoto’s eyes that he couldn’t identify. 

He walked back to the replicant and grabbed his hand, snapping him out of his daze. 

Makoto blinked down at him for a second, trying to take stock of the situation before smiling genially at the concerned look on his face. “Oh, sorry, Haru-chan. I must have spaced out for a second there.” He chuckled a little, rubbing a hand on the back of his neck. 

Haru scowled, wishing he could find the words that he desperately wanted to say- wishing he could explain how Makoto was Makoto no matter what the rest of the world thought about the matter. He couldn’t though- words had never been his forte- so instead he had to try and project his thoughts as loudly as possible to try and get them to translate to his friend. 

The brunette smiled sheepishly at him, eyes softening at the harsh look on his face. “Let’s catch up to Rin and Sousuke, okay?” he said, squeezing his hand back. 

It was nice to know that even though Haru wasn’t good with words, Makoto always understood him anyways. 

* * *

It’s nearly a week later when the chief calls Haru in to his office and tells him that he and his partner are being sent as backup for Rin and his partner. The chief is always so careful to make sure he says “partner” for the androids, and not their names. He makes sure that everyone else does the same in his presence as well- and Haru is no exception, lest he wants to be suspended for “disrespectful behavior” again- and it always leaves a sour taste in his mouth to pretend like his best friend isn’t worthy of having a name. 

Makoto is never called into the chief’s office unless it’s to be reprimanded. Every single time, without fail, it’s because of some civilian filing a complaint about having to deal with the police through a replicant instead of a human officer. It’s never because Makoto does something wrong- he’s always unfailingly kind and respectful- but there’s so many people who can’t stand speaking to replicants. So Makoto gets blamed for existing.

Haru hated it with every fiber of his being, but there’s nothing he can do about it. 

He merely nods his confirmation of the orders he’s been given before he stalks out of the office. He doesn’t want to go be backup for Rin and Sousuke, but he can’t wait to get out of the building. Can’t wait to get away from the sterile white walls everywhere, from the instructions printed on every notice board on how to properly check a replicant’s ID code, from all the coworkers that sneer at Makoto like he’s less than the dirt they walk on. 

He tells Makoto what their new assignment is, grabbing his bag and striding out the door without waiting to see if his friend is following or what his expression looks like. 

Makoto hates doing blade runner work. Not just because it’s so specifically about killing his own kind. But also because at the heart of it all, Makoto is a pacifist. He doesn’t like violence. He doesn’t like to see others in pain. He doesn’t like watching others die. He especially doesn’t like to be the cause of their death. 

He’s had to kill replicants before- it’s rare, but he’s done it. Sometimes in his darkest moments, Haru can see Makoto standing with their blood on his clothes, splattered on his face, and an all-encompassing emptiness in his eyes. A dark surge of nothingness that threatens to engulf him. Because the only way for Makoto to survive is to make himself numb. 

Haru would gladly give his life if it meant that Makoto would never have to go through that again. He does his best to ensure that it doesn’t happen, but the rest of the universe can’t seem to uphold itself to that same standard. 

He hates that they’re being sent on this  assignment  and curses the chief for giving it to them. But the bastard always does it. He could easily send out someone else, but he seems to think that sending Makoto out on these missions is the best option.

Haru isn’t sure if it’s because the cold-hearted bastard thinks of it as a way of keeping Makoto complacent by reminding him of what they could do to him if he ever went rogue, or because he thinks Makoto is the most expendable officer at the precinct. Either way, it makes him want to strangle the man. 

Sometimes he thinks the people responsible for the Blackout of 2022 made the right decision. Sure, it shut down the whole west coast, and a lot of looting and violence and other bad things happened during those ten days of darkness, but the Replicant Registration Database was destroyed. All the Nexus-8’s finally had a chance to hide, to save themselves from the Human Supremacists that were hellbent on hunting them down and murdering them.

Just thinking about what those times must have been like for replicants made him nauseous. The Human Supremacist Movement had been at its peak then, infiltrating every level of the system. They’d abused their  privileges  and used the RRD to find their targets. Replicants were killed in the streets everyday- brutally, senselessly- in ways that made the most deranged criminals shiver. 

There was one murder that had given Haru nightmares for months after he read about it. In 2021, a replicant named Cassian had left his apartment to buy groceries. But Human Supremacists had been waiting for him, ambushing him in the street, in broad daylight, and skinned him alive. They stripped all the muscle and organs from his bones, burning his skeleton in an impromptu bonfire so that what remained was a blackened pile of bones. The rest of him they took home as trophies or left scattered in the streets. 

The image of that charred skull next to a preserved brown eyeball with the ID: NX-3824.8 on it, displayed proudly in a museum after being  _ generously _  donated by a private collector, haunted his dreams for weeks afterward. 

He still dreamt about it sometimes. The only difference was that nowadays it always had the ID: ORCA-4345.7 on a bright green eye instead. 

* * *

“Haru-chan, you should really lie down. You need to rest!”

“Drop the chan,” he replied automatically, not really paying attention to what the other was saying. He was too busy trying to keep the world from spinning out of control while he stepped into his apartment. 

“Makoto’s right, dumbass. Lie down for a minute before you pass out on the damn floor,” Rin said sharply. The shrillness of his voice made Haru’s head ring. 

Of course, his head might also have been ringing because of the concussion he got when one of the replicants they’d found tried to bash his head in with a steel pipe, but that was neither here nor there. The android obviously hadn’t succeeded in killing him, but they still got a good knock in before Rin took them out. 

Honestly, Haru didn’t think it was that bad. He just needed a little nap. That’s all. He’d be right as rain soon enough. 

He told them as much, but he had a feeling the effect was somewhat lessened when he nearly stumbled into the wall. 

It was the last straw for Makoto, who proceeded to pick him up bridal style- which he knew full well that Haru hated normally- and carry him to his bedroom. Normally he would have protested, but given the circumstances, he decided to let it go. He only grumbled half-heartedly when the taller man tucked him into bed as well. He let his eyes fall closed for the moment. 

“Is it okay for him to fall asleep? I thought people could go into comas or something if they did that after a concussion,” he heard Rin ask, a note of concern tinging his voice. 

There was some light shuffling, as if someone was organizing something nearby- maybe the papers he’d left on his desk?- before Makoto spoke. “Well, the trouble walking isn’t a very good sign, but his pupils aren’t dilated, and he can still hold a conversation. He was pretty tired before we caught up to you guys anyways, so that may contribute to it. I’ll keep him awake a little longer, but he should be okay to sleep after a bit. I’ll wake him every couple hours to check on him just in case. The most important thing is for him to get rest.” 

“You sure you want to do that, Mako? You ought to go home and get some rest too,” Rin said. 

Haru peeled open his eyes to look quizzically at his best friend, internally agreeing with his boyfriend. Blade Runner work always wore Makoto out in more ways than one.

He looked tired. His shoulders were slightly slumped, his clothes rumpled from the rain and the scuffle, and his smile was dimmer than usual. It was enough to make Haru try and sit up so he could insist on Makoto laying down, but he was stopped prematurely by a large hand that pressed him gently back into his mattress. 

“Haru-chan, don’t get up. It’s fine. I’m fine. Don’t worry about me, okay?”

Don’t worry about me. As if. Telling Haru not to worry about Makoto was like telling the smog to clear up. 

He knew nothing he said to Makoto would change the other’s mind, so he settled for glaring at Rin instead. His boyfriend sighed, shaking his head. “Get some rest, dumbass. Makoto can get some shut eye after he’s done babysitting you. As long as you behave, he won’t have any reason to tire himself out more.”

He glared harder at that, but the effect was lost on Rin, who had turned his back and left the room to head out to HQ. He and Sousuke still had to report back to the chief about what went down.

At least it was quiet after Rin left. He almost fell asleep a few minutes later, but a squeeze to his left hand snapped him back into wakefulness. 

Makoto smiled apologetically down at him. “Sorry, but I did say I would keep you awake for a little longer,” he said softly. The hand wrapped around Haru’s was warm, and although the skin was kind of dry it still felt soft. It didn’t have the rough feeling of callouses that caught against his hand the way Rin’s would whenever he insisted that they hold hands to keep up appearances. 

“You don’t have to stay. You should go home and sleep.”

Again, that rueful smile appeared. “I want to stay. I don’t mind watching over you. And I- I don’t really feel like sleeping right now,” he admitted. His eyes flicked down, tracing indistinct patterns in the carpet. 

Haru clenched his jaw, suddenly furious about their assignment again. He wanted to follow Rin and Sousuke to the chief’s office and give the man a lesson in ethics, taught by his favorite professors- punching and screaming. 

Obviously, he couldn’t do that, but it was nice to imagine. 

Makoto, noticing the tension in his frame, ran a soothing hand through his hair. “My parents called earlier. They went on a trip to visit your parents and are having a great time.  Apparently,  they even got to see a real canary. There was a special raptor festival going on, so they decided to go. They didn’t have any real birds of prey, but they had plenty of electric ones. The canary was the only real bird that they brought, even though it’s not a raptor. But a bird is a bird, I suppose,” he chuckled. 

“Maybe someday we’ll get to see a real canary too, huh?” he said. This time his smile actually reached his eyes, and Haru’s heart did a funny little stutter in his chest at the sight. 

He only hummed noncommittally, but Makoto didn’t seem to mind. He kept his largely one-sided conversation going for another twenty minutes before he trailed off, letting Haru slip away peacefully to the sound of his voice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hmmmm.....really meant to update this sooner lol. too bad i was busy with school and that whole graduating nonsense. but yoooooo now i'm done, so like MAYBE I'll actually update faster! I mean I won't count on it, but it would be nice, wouldn't it??? sakfjsjlJALALhjk


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